You know the saying “You don’t get to choose your family but you get to choose your friends”? While I do believe there is truth to that I also believe that even though we don’t choose our family here on earth our family was chosen by the creator who created each of us and sent us here to earth. Yes! I truly believe that God choose each family unit and there is a reason why we end up together here on earth.
I firmly believe we have much to learn from each other and much to teach each other.
If you find yourself thinking “thank heavens I get to choose my friends” and “I much prefer to spend time with my friends because there is less drama” I challenge you to change your perspective. I totally understand that there is a few of you shaking your head as you you mutter the perfectly reasonalble reason why your family is just not worth fighting for and maybe you are right but, just perhaps growth and goodness could come from fighting for you family.
When I say fight for your family I mean-
- Spend time trying to figure out what makes your family members tick and then serve them in that way. Something amazing and healing happens when you serve those in your life in the way they most love to be served; it softens them, it opens them up and love flows. it also changes the person who is serving.
- Fight to empathize with them. Often the reason that divides us are because we are so stuck on our side of the equation that we cannot possibly fathom why they are the way they are. If we can spend some time in their shoes, pray for understanding and an expansion to take place within our hearts to feel empathy for them, bridges will be rebuilt and strong holds will support our relationship.
- Fight to create memories that unite each other. Not memories that look good on facebook or instagram or are great to bring up in bragging conversations with co-workers but memories that will go down in your history as times you would never trade because they knitted your relationship so tightly together.
- Fight to forgive each other and always say I am sorry. We have and will all make mistakes, actually so many that there is not a number large enough to define it- so we better leave the judging up to God and become expert in forgiving each other and and ourselves. A grudge is like poison; it just festers and becomes worse over time. It will eventually become so consuming that it might even kill all that was healthy and good. Fight to leave grudges as soon as you recognize you have one. Put in the hard work to work through them and then get rid of it, cut it out like a cancerous tumor and never look back.
- Fight to understand why God placed you in the same family. Ask Him, He who created you and them to develop an understanding why you need each other. Ask Him to broaden your mind and expand the walls of your heart to make room for the answers. Allow Him to be the glue that brings you together and fixes all the imperfections.
I say fight because it will take effort. It will be hard because satan knows the strongest force on earth today is that of family. Satan is attacking on every side to make you throw your hands in the air and walk away from family. This is the fight that is raging here on earth right now. Your family is worth fighting for; your family unit, extended family and your in-laws; they are all worth fighting for.